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[fionnuisce]

'You've reached Lord El-Melloi II. Leave a message and I'll get back to you.'

[network username: silverrose]

Comments

[drewthetower]

You two move fast.

[fionnuisce]

...August, what are you implying, exactly? It's the name of one of his weapons, I only made a variation of it my username because it was the simplest thing I could think of.

1/?

[drewthetower]

You know--

2/?

[drewthetower]

[Wait a sec. This is Waver.]

3/?

[drewthetower]

[Waver's a workaholic but he isn't especially prone to playing stupid.]

4/?

[drewthetower]

[When he's stupid it's usually genuine.]

5/?

[drewthetower]

[That can only mean...]

DONE

[drewthetower]

Waver, do you or do you not have a big gay crush on Diarmuid?

1/3

[fionnuisce]

Wh-

[fionnuisce]

Fuck me, Irisviel was right, it really is that obvious.

[fionnuisce]

What about it? That's not-...that doesn't concern anybody else.

[drewthetower]

You are in love with Diarmuid ua Duibhne, but he doesn't fucking know, does he?

[fionnuisce]

Of course he doesn't.

[Again with the not-quite-glasses-adjustment.]

[drewthetower]

Why the hell doesn't he!?

[fionnuisce]

...August, you're a close friend and I value your perspective. So I'm going to give you the most sincere answer to that I possibly can.

And it's because I'm terrified of saying the one thing that ruined his life.

[drewthetower]

What ruined his life? I didn't study Celts, I focused on Greek.

[fionnuisce]

[Pressing a hand to his head, Waver took a slow breath and explained in the exact tone of a teacher giving a lecture on their most well-studied subject.]

There was once a band of knights called the Fianna, led by Fionn mac Cumhaill. Fionn was betrothed to a princess named Gráinne. However, at the celebration of their engagement, she happened to catch sight of Fionn's strongest knight and second in command--Diarmuid, bearing a cursed mark on his face which compelled women to fall in love with him.

Either he eloped with her and betrayed Fionn in the process, or she would place curses of danger and destruction on him. He chose the former, and Fionn--being a rat bastard in his own right--didn't take it well. They were hunted across the country until eventually things cooled off and Fionn...ostensibly forgave the transgression.

['Ostensibly' here sounding a lot like 'that lying sack of shit']

...The point is that I can't tell him. I can't even imagine how many times he's heard those words with no sincerity behind them, and if it were me I would want nothing to do with the concept of romance at all.

[drewthetower]

[This is all fair and valid, and August sees Waver's point. However:]

He matched his username to yours.

[fionnuisce]

Yeah, so what? He's a dual-wielder, matching is kind of what he does.

[drewthetower]

...I can't tell if you're being genuine here or not. Waver, did you ask him to match usernames?

[fionnuisce]

I'm his Master, that's just sort of something he would do. I don't know what point you're trying to make here.

[drewthetower]

The point I'm trying to make here is I think it either is or has a--wait a second. When did you say you first met him?

[fionnuisce]

What--I was nineteen, what does that have to do with it?

[drewthetower]

You've been pining for ten years, haven't you?

[fionnuisce]

I--what? I'm not--I haven't been pining, what the fuck is wrong with you?